Abusthed.

Shit is weak, brah.
Like c'mon.

I know you tried to make it sound
like you wanted to hang out with me,
but the whole
"Wanna hang out? Can you pick me up?
I'd be making out with tweens in your back seat"
deal isn't really flyin with me.
Doesn't quite work.

You should've tried your luck with
"oh hey, I want to use you for a ride
to where ever I please while two
fifteen year olds suck my face off."

At least you'd be blatantly honest.